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Enter the Ninja
1981; directed by Menahem Golan

With the rise of popularity in VCRs during the early 1980's, video stores were left scrambling to keep up with customers who were ravenous to pop in any sort of new product. One of the companies to take a bigger chunk of the growing market was Cannon Films, whose cheap action fare also became a favorite of the burgeoning cable TV market. Cannon's flagship production could be argued to be Enter the Ninja, which unleashed a slate of knockoffs after it hit people's Betamaxes and late-night cable fare like Up All Night. Sadly, while the movie provided excitement to many a young Gen-Xer, it really hasn't aged all that well and should be approached with caution.

Enter the Ninja

The movie starts out decently enough, with a white (both in race and in color of their outfit) ninja taking down a clan of bad ninjas. But, oh wait! it turns out all the bloodshed was just whiteboy's (aka Cole, played by popular Italian B-movie actor Franco Nero) final test in order to get his ninja degree -- and yes, it is literally a degree on paper, I guess to show your friends or potential employers that you did indeed graduate from ninja school.

Enter the Ninja

Anyway, after leaving Japan, Cole heads to Manila, where he hooks up with an old war buddy, Frank (Alex Courtney) and his wife, Mary Ann (Susan George). Frank is having trouble with a hook-handed thug, inventively named The Hook (Zachi Noy), who is trying to take over his plantation. So, of course, Cole puts his ninja skills to good use... by beating up a bunch of people in a crowded bar. Um, isn't a big part of ninjitsu stealth? Like so many Two P's and El Gado's from Final Fight, Cole continues to mercilessly beat down generic thugs until the main bad guy, Venarius (Christopher George), decides to hire a ninja of his own. And guess what? It turns out to be Hasegawa (Sho Kosugi), who was the one guy Cole didn't get along with in ninja school. Oh, the irony!

Enter the Ninja

I'm sorry if the above synopsis spoiled the movie for you, but really, this is the kind of movie that telegraphs itself all the way through. Of course, this sort of thing is common in low-budget action fare, so film-makers will compensate for the lack of an actual story by throwing in a lot of fights. Enter the Ninja's big problem is that it just doesn't have enough ninja antics shown on the screen. There are a couple of decent sequences at the beginning and the end of the movie, but most of the picture's running time is dominated by Cole going around in horrid early 80's fashions, sporting a porn star mustasche, and spouting bon mots like "A ninja doesn't kill. He eliminates only for defensive purposes." With dialogue like that, no wonder Enter the Ninja has graduated from being a cult classic to just another bit of fodder in your local video store's 99 cent bargain bin.

RATING: 5

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