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Ninja in the Killing Fields
(aka The Ninja Connection, Killer Ninjas)
1986; directed by Godfrey Ho (credited as York Lam)

Even though he tries to cover his tracks here by hiding under a pseudonym, after you see the first few minutes of this so-called "film", there's no denying at all that this is a Godfrey Ho production. If your dream movie consists of poorly-coordinated white guys dressed in garish ninja suits attempting to fight each other, then this is the picture for you. Most everyone else with half a brain in their head would do well to stay far, far away from this stinker.

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Those of you familiar with Godfrey Ho's work know that putting together any sort of coherent plot description for his movies is nigh-impossible, due to the fact that his films are almost always a mish-mash of two or more seperate productions. Ninja in the Killing Fields seems to actually be one of Ho's few movies that is made up of original footage, but that doesn't mean it makes any more sense. Bascially, there's a group of drug-dealing ninjas (led by Louis Roth) in Thailand, so a super-cop (Ho mainstay Stuart Smith) is sent over to take care of the problem.

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But things aren't all that simple. Perhaps so he could get more footage for future releases, Ho introduces a plethora of subplots, each featuring a new set of actors, such as my personal favorite, one about a coke-bottle glasses wearing former ninja on the run from the clan. All this sort of stuff is mashed together with all the subtlety of Carrot Top after a bender into a headache-inducing mix guaranteed to make you reach for the fast-forward button quicker than you can say "ninja magic" -- which, in this movie's case, apparently includes the ability for dead ninjas to turn into toads.

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Things might have been a little better if the movie was edited with any sense of continuity at all. For instance, in one scene, Stuart fights off a ninja that is hanging on his car. After the ninja is thrown off, he shoots an explosive arrow, blowing up the car. Literally seconds after the car is shown in flames, we see Stuart running around the jungle (his shirt seems to have been lost in the explosion) and then getting into a fight with an angry gardener. Those sorts of "what the hell?" moments will manage to generate a few chuckles, but it's not enough to warrant setting aside ninety minutes of your life to actually sit through this bottom of the barrel dreck.

RATING: 3

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