The Inspector Wears Skirts II
(aka The Inspector Wears Skirts 2, The Inspector Wears Skirts Part 2, The Inspector Wears Skirts Part II, The Inspector Wears Skirt 2)
1989; directed by Wellson Chin

The original Inspector Wears Skirts wasn't a great movie by any stretch of the imagination. Hell, it barely qualifies as an average entry in the girls-with-guns genre. But at least it delivered a small bit of decent action, which its' sequel can't do, instead fully assaulting the viewer with awful attempts at comedy that will have you wondering why you even started the DVD in the first place.

Inspector Wears Skirts II reunites most of the cast from the original movie, with Madam Wu (Sibelle Hu) leading a group of elite female officers known as the Flying Tigers. There's a new class of cadets (among them Amy Yip) who aren't meshing with the veterans, most notably Amy (Sandra Ng). Far too much of the "hilarious" running time is dominated by lame jokes as the ladies bicker amongst each other. It's yet more Hong Kong comedy at the expense of Amy Yip's breasts -- how original! When the comedy isn't stupid, it's mean-spirited, as evidenced in one scene where the rookies are covered in excrement. That's shit for those of you without a thesaurus handy.

As if that wasn't enough to make you cringe, there's also a lot of celluoid real estate dedicated to a love triangle between Madam Wu, Kan (Stanley Fung), and Lo (Melvin Wong). I felt embarrassed for the actors involved as they tried to inject some sort of humor and warmth into their lines, which were apparently written on the back of a cocktail napkin after a binge of Pabst Blue Ribbon. When emotions come to a head during a dance sequence, my paitence was almost at its' end, and frankly, when another dance number entered the picture, I had to take a break, for fear of sending a snapped DVD back to Netflix.

The film-makers try to liven up things a during the last fifteen minutes or so by hatching a half-baked scenario about a group of terrorists (led by Jeff Falcon) trying to take over the police academy. The action, which was helmed by the Jackie Chan stunt team, is actually pretty good, but it comes too late in the festivities for the viewer to really care about who's getting hit or falling off buildings. More than likely, all you're going to care about as this movie comes to an end is why the hell you just wasted ninety minutes watching it.

RATING: 3